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What Love Is

Posted by: Andrew Aaron on 11/13/2009

 So many people would agree that they know love when they feel it, yet it can be difficult to describe.  My definition of love is the committment to another's well-being, nourishment and growth, while also protecting them from harm.  The following is a list of actions, attitudes, qualities and characterstics that contribute to the creation of feelings of love.


LOVE is when you are being:

  • Open
  • Sharing
  • Respectful
  • Patient
  • Friendly
  • Trusting
  • Giving
  • Serving
  • Setting appropriate limits
  • Strong
  • Supportive
  • Vulnerable in openness
  • Encouraging
  • Nourishing
  • Generous
  • Honest
  • Responsive
  • Acknowledging
  • Giving through the right effort
  • Forgiving
  • Receptive
  • Being your best
  • Communicative
  • Assertive
  • Accepting
  • Open to connection
  • Self-supporting
  • Understanding
  • Giving consensual sexual pleasure
  • Listening
  • Dependable
  • Taking healthy risks
  • Sustaining


LOVE IS NOT when you are being:

  • Selfish
  • Addiction
  • Dependant
  • Angry
  • Playing it safe
  • Fearful
  • Sarcastic
  • Attacking
  • Jealous
  • Avoidant
  • Hurtful
  • Withholding
  • Controlling
  • Passive
  • Denying
  • Lazy
  • Irresponsible
  • Closed
  • Attacking
  • Competitive
  • Dominatiing
  • Susceptible to weakness
  • Rejecting
  • Blaming
  • Closed to connection
  • Disrespectful
  • Hurtful by name-calling
  • Excusionary by keeping secrets
  • Negative

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